Lovely piece, Dorothy. In a related vein, I just read a piece about cancel culture in the Yale Review. We only cancel what we loved deeply, the author wrote. Cancellation is a way to protect a broken heart.
I think that's true. and I also think folks cancel what feels threatening or what they don't understand. Thanks for reading and for taking the time to comment.
What a remarkable piece of literature. My heart breaks just as yours. There is such finality in contemplating death. That is why Hemingway wrote for whom the bells tolls. Bells tolls for all of us —as members of humanity we must struggle with the eventual death of our loved ones, our friendships and ours….we all approach our last journey!
Thanks for asking. Something along the lines of, "I'm sorry for the way I blamed you for everything. I'm sorry I wasn't honest about my feelings years earlier. There were dynamics that were hard for me and I'd love to talk about how we might address them." I can't make her see this and I can't do her work for her.
Thank you for writing this, Dorothy. It is beautifully-written and resonated with me, too. I have also experienced the loss of close friendship and it is very painful.
I literally gasped as if someone punched me in the stomach when I read your piece. I too have experienced this loss of friendship. Unfortunately more than once. The only thing I can liken it to is a death which has to be grieved, mourned and felt.
I'm sorry you have suffered this loss, Dorothy it is great and you expressed it beautifully.
Lovely piece, Dorothy. In a related vein, I just read a piece about cancel culture in the Yale Review. We only cancel what we loved deeply, the author wrote. Cancellation is a way to protect a broken heart.
I think that's true. and I also think folks cancel what feels threatening or what they don't understand. Thanks for reading and for taking the time to comment.
I'm so sorry for your loss. That cuts so deeply.
Thanks Lucy. It does.
Sad and beautiful and true
Thanks for reading and for taking the time to comment. And yes, it's very sad. I still miss my friend.
What a beautifully written piece. Thank you for sharing your story and your pain. I am sorry for your loss.
Thanks for reading Andrea. And thanks for extending that empathy.
What a remarkable piece of literature. My heart breaks just as yours. There is such finality in contemplating death. That is why Hemingway wrote for whom the bells tolls. Bells tolls for all of us —as members of humanity we must struggle with the eventual death of our loved ones, our friendships and ours….we all approach our last journey!
Thanks so much for reading Ofelia. I've not read Hemingway for a very LONG time but yes, none of us can escape death.
Oh Dorothy you articulated so beautifully the context and scenario and emotions. I too have felt the gut punch.
Thank you for describing this in a way that makes this invisible loss real and valid.
Thanks so much for reading and for taking the time to write this not. I'm sorry you know this space too.
Beautiful writing, and a poignant story that is unfortunately far too relatable. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you and I'm sorry that you get it.
What do you wish your friend would say to you?
Thanks for asking. Something along the lines of, "I'm sorry for the way I blamed you for everything. I'm sorry I wasn't honest about my feelings years earlier. There were dynamics that were hard for me and I'd love to talk about how we might address them." I can't make her see this and I can't do her work for her.
I'm so sorry, Dorothy. I wish I didn't relate to this experience, but I know it all too well.
Thanks Karen. And I'm sorry on your behalf! Based on the comments and emails I've received, it's fairly common right now.
I resonate with this post. So hard to have long-term friendships change and sever. :(
I wish you didn't resonate with it as that means you know the hurt. Thanks for reading.
Thanks for writing — I wish I weren’t familiar with this experience, but you’ve described it beautifully.
I'm sorry this is familiar to you too.
Thank you for writing this, Dorothy. It is beautifully-written and resonated with me, too. I have also experienced the loss of close friendship and it is very painful.
It's surprising to me how long the hurt lasts, even though I've done much spiritual work around it. I'm sorry you know this space too.
Thank you for writing that and being so transparent. It resonated with my experience.
Thanks for reading and for taking the time to comment. And I'm sorry you've had a similar experience.
I literally gasped as if someone punched me in the stomach when I read your piece. I too have experienced this loss of friendship. Unfortunately more than once. The only thing I can liken it to is a death which has to be grieved, mourned and felt.
I'm sorry you have suffered this loss, Dorothy it is great and you expressed it beautifully.
Jeannine
I'm sorry you've had this experience too Jeannine. Wish it wasn't true for both of us.
That is sad. Politics and other things have created rifts between Christians.
It is sad. This would not have been my choice.
Beautiful and poignant metaphor for friendship and life.
“Welcome to advent… waiting in the dark.” So powerful and true!